Beware and Be Aware
If we delve into constant practice and are able to discern the workings of our minds better, even the above two words give two different perceptions. The first coming with a ‘self’ – a sign of danger to oneself, of fear and anticipation that something will happen. The other is non-interference i.e. just the function of being aware. One is falling in, the other is stepping back.
This is clear now. Indeed in my journey what was previously taken for granted as ‘the norm of thoughts’ in my mind has taken on an energy of learning, of investigation and all in all, not trusting in the nuances of what the mind tells. Nothing is the norm. There is always a story to tell – whether it is a story spun to perpetuate defilements or for us to see the reality of how our minds function. All is not what it seems and we are never upset for the reason we think it is. Every moment is the chance to make a decision.
I had one pertinent learning recently – looking out for defilements in disguise. Often defilements are stealthy, hidden behind righteousness. Most times we don’t even notice it and hence we took for granted we got our practice right.
During the recent incessant run of Chinese New Year shopping, chores and pre-preparations, traffic and human jams on roads and shopping areas were the usual mad, festive scramble. While waiting for quite some time for a car to vacate a parking lot while a long line of cars were waiting behind me, I noticed the mind become impatient. It is useful to even notice this as the whole day was nothing but waiting and waiting in lines. However, it had stopped at the storyline with accusations beginning to arise against the car owner. The questions of ‘who is right’ and ‘what is right’ came out. And I chose what is right i.e. the right mindedness. Everyone is in the same mad scramble. A little sooner or later makes no difference as long as I get my chores done and he wants his chores done too. End of the story!
Another typical festive example is in giving way – at queues, at car parks or while walking among jostling crowds. I had questioned the motive behind my giving way – whether it is from understanding or from the notion of sacrifice. If it is from understanding you will know it is the right thing to do and it stops there – however, if it comes from sacrifice then there is an expectation of something in return. Defilements come in the guise of what is ‘my right of way’. However, don’t overlook it even if you think that ‘it is right to give way’. Lookout for residues of thoughts. Some stealthy thoughts are still trailing because there is a sense of righteousness.
Many times I noticed that in everything I do, especially when I do it for people – it could be favors, it could be offering dana, providing care-giving or important information - I need to watch for ‘residues’ of thoughts. I call it residues because if there is expectation, there are always remnants to thoughts – still something waiting in the background. But with understanding, there are no residues. Just do it. Done.
I truly appreciate every sharing that I can give that is of quality, as I know while I share I am giving back to the community who gave it to me in the first place.
To sum up my title, it is simply perfect to BEWARE and BE AWARE because it is just a progression in our practice. Only when we BEWARE we start out being watchful of the workings of our minds, and later BE AWARE is when it becomes second nature to us through consistent practice brought on by right understanding.
We are in this together. Let’s do it (without residues)!
In grace,
Yvonne Loh
27 Feb 2024